Allergy Mums / Support for families with allergies

publication date: Feb 17, 2014

Don’t Blame My Girl!

If you’ve looked at my blog then you know that my daughter suffers from allergies (milk, egg) as well as reflux. The allergies are bad enough to deal with at birthday parties and when meeting up with friends for meals, but the reflux is the killer. It means that sugar and fat set off sever acid indigestion resulting in pain and vomiting. We control Molly’s reflux pretty well with her diet, using the drugs only when we get things wrong. So that generally means – no sweets, maybe a biscuit or two with lunch, but that’s it for baked goods. After dinner it’s best not to have cakes or biscuits for pudding, as the fat and sugar is just too much before bedtime.

Everyone knows Molly’s health issues and we’ve been very clear – she has to get used to people eating cakes, cookies, ice creams, sweets, crisps etc around her. She has to get used to saying ‘no thank you’ and she can’t sulk or make an issue of it. It’s hard. But this is life and we can’t expect everyone else to follow her diet when she’s around. Now she’s fine with that (as much as a 9 yr old can be) and behaves really well in those situations, (we hear about it at home but that’s what home is for).

So here’s my gripe...when out with friends, the parents keep refusing to let their kids have pudding because ‘it’s not fair on Molly’ – queue stage whisper to me ‘I don’t want her having a pudding anyway’. ARGGGHHH. Then say ‘no’ to your child. Don’t use mine as an excuse. The other kids will blame her...and do, even though the parents assure me that they don’t hold it against her. Of course they do...they’re 9...they aren’t saints for heaven’s sake.  And they let Molly know how irritated they are. Kids won’t say ‘I don’t want Molly over to dinner because I can’t have sweets, pudding or crisps when she’s here’. But it will impact on her friendships if she’s used as an excuse to refuse puddings and sweets. I’ve told friends this a thousand no avail. Is it too much to expect people to stop doing this? Apparently it is.

So now we’ve a new strategy....when we go out will take ‘Molly friendly’ biscuits or cupcakes everywhere we go. When it’s time for pudding, Molly will whip out a cake. Parents can then make their own decisions. Molly can have a bite...announce she’s ‘stuffed’ and that she wants to save the rest for later. That way parents will have to say ‘no’ to their children without blaming mine!

I’ll let you know how we get on....

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